On a day not too long ago, I spent a few minutes talking with a boy who was the son of one of my patients.
He was in first grade and he asked if he could talk with me because there was something on his mind.
“Okay, what is it?” I asked.
We talked about what he did in school.
As he spoke, I remembered that kids spend a lot of time focused on artwork at his age, and so I asked him about this because personally, I loved art then, and I still do.
“Well, I’m not that excited about art,” he told me. “Mine’s not that good.”
“How do you know?” I asked. “How do you know it’s not that good? Who’s telling you that?”
I asked him about what kind of projects he and his classmates had been doing.
“We made this beautiful clay hand.”
“You mean the one you paint a different color and you get your hand printed on? And then you put it in the kiln and they fire it so that it’ll last forever and have sort of a shine to it?”
He said, “Yeah.”
“What color was yours?”
“Blue, I painted it blue. It’s got my hand print on it. I took it home and I showed my mom, and mom was just sort of, I guess busy that day. She said, ‘Oh, just put it away, don’t let it collect dust. Someday, maybe you’ll become such a good artist that you’ll have such nice art, we’ll want to put it on the wall, and this is fine for a beginning trial.’”
“Okay, so how did you interpret that?”
“I don’t want to do art anymore,” he told me. In his own charming first grade words, he went on to explain how he felt like he had let his mother down.
He told me that it wasn’t all clear to him, but that it seemed the quality of his art somehow put some distance between him and his mother.
“Why?” I asked.
He told me, in the simple and heartfelt words of a first grader, how this comment made him separated from his mother.
He believed that he hadn’t been able to please her. He was convinced that his mother believed the blue clay hand wasn’t something worthy of appreciation.
“No, that’s not really what she meant,” I told him.
It took quite a while for him to understand what I was trying to say.
You Can’t Blame Him, Can You?
Here’s a boy who’s creative, thoughtful, loves his mother, and wants to make her happy.
He’s smart enough and observant enough to sense emotional distance.
(Something plenty of adults can’t do.)
This boy simply wound up confused when his mother responded in a way he didn’t expect.
So I told him, “Look, I did the same thing when I was your age so here’s what’s going to happen, here’s what we’re going to do.
“You’re going to come and get a treatment with me sometime soon. We’re going to go through how you can become, if that’s what you want, a great artist. And, if you want to be great at something else, like a professional athlete, then we’ll focus on that.”
“You can do that?” he asked.
“No,” I replied. “I’m not going to do it. You’re going to do it. The way this world’s set up, it’s all based on Energy, on The Source Energy that feeds all the things that are good.
“All the wonderful things we have are based on The Source Energy from physics.
“If you can learn to harness this energy by doing some easy practices, if you watch the videos and listen to the audios that I created after studying the 5,000 year-old discipline of Lao Tzu, you’ll be able to do it too.”
“Well, I’m looking forward to it,” he said.
“Put a smile on your face and stop worrying that you displeased your mother or that you shouldn’t bring home any more artwork.”
He said, “Okay.”
If you were there listening to this conversation, you would have heard the loneliness in his voice.
You could see it in his expression.
The Refreshing Wisdom Of Children
Everything turned out fine.
It’s fascinating that kids go through those experiences just like adults.
It happens all the time. You tell your partner, “Here, I’ve got your dry cleaning,” and you’re told, “Just put it over there and I’ll put it away, later.”
No wonder with reactions like that so many people feel lonely.
Some people interpret a comment like this as disrespectful, which can easily lead to a feeling of loneliness.
This is actually a pathway in your body that you don’t have to follow. Our society and our culture conditions us to react negatively to comments like this and to allow pain to develop.
This is why it’s so helpful to keep your Energy field up, which happens on its own when you do your Energy practices.
What Have You Learned To Live With?
Over the years, when we talk about life’s challenges, many of my patients have told me something like, ” I just learn to live with it.”
When I dig deeper they often say, “Well, I’ve learned to live with a lot of people ignoring me. I’ve learned to close down.”
My young friend who loved art could have closed down… but he didn’t. Fortunately, he was wise beyond his years, and he understood the importance of staying connected.
I helped him understand that shutting himself off from the world isn’t good, that it could cause some health problems.
The opposite of closing down is the solution. This is why we do all The Source Energy practices.
They help you open up all your sensors, so you can expand. When this happens, you move from being a prisoner in a confined space to being free in a connecting space.
You grow your abilities and expand this pace all the time.